What should I do if someone gets angry at you
Not necessarily behave like a bitch to offend someone. Each person has their borders, and you can easily fail to notice that they had violated. Tell us what to do if someone gets angry at you, and how to benefit from this situation.
Understand how words affect the offended person to you
We all react differently to someone's anger. Some people are frightened and run into a stupor, others are upset, others prefer to defend and respond to aggression. Your spontaneous reaction may exacerbate the conflict, so better to stop, exhale, watch your feelings, and then decide what you will do.
If you have a chance to be alone, before responding to someone else's anger, write down everything you want to tell people. It does not matter whether you think you are to blame for his offense or not, you should carefully choose the words to prove their case or apologize.
Understand own prejudices
I understand how you feel about anger as a whole. Do you think you're a bad person when you're angry? Perceive the expression of negative emotions from other people like rude or to recognize their right to different feelings? Do you offend someone's criticism or dissatisfaction, even if you know that you deserve it?
It is important to be aware of their prejudices, not to become their victim. For example, if you feel that you sweeping resentment when someone points out your wrong, you can understand that the problem is your attitude towards criticism and anger, rather than the person who decided to express them.
to define its intentions
Before you choose a plan, decide how you'd like to your fellowship with you hurt a person develops further. If it's just a friend or colleague with whom you do not maintain friendly relations can be quite sincere polite apology. But when it comes to a close friend, relative or romantic partner, you probably have to do some way to go before you can get close again, or even strengthen your relationship.
Tell me everything that you feel
Often people tend to be closed during the conflict, and to keep his feelings to himself, but try to talk about the emotions that cause anger of another person with you. Shew their prejudices, reactions and intentions.
For example, you can say, "I have a prejudice that your anger is unfair, so the first reaction to it - to prove to you that you are not right. But I would like to keep our friendship, so feel very mixed feelings. I do not know how to talk to you, because, on the one hand, it seems to me that I was unjustly wronged, on the other - I'm afraid to lose you. "
An important rule: to talk about themselves. Do not stray to the phrase: "You did well, so I responded well," they sound like accusations, and make people even more angry.
Do not be afraid to seem vulnerable, as a rule, this behavior causes the companion to open up and become more loyal. He will realize that you did not want to hurt him or conflict.
to acknowledge its responsibility
Even if your role in the conflict is low, recognizes its share of the responsibility. Maybe you hurt a person, however unwittingly, or said rude to his aggression than aggravated the quarrel.
In the conflict always involves two. Ask yourself what your actions have created this situation and admit it out loud. It quickly reduces the heat of anger, and encourages people to admit that he, too, something was wrong.
Conflict - the driving force of any relationship. After a quarrel, they often go to a new level of intimacy and openness, so use the opportunity to get to know yourself, the other person and learn how to interact effectively with others.
Ask your companion what he feels and what your actions have led to this. Even if you do not think that he is right, try to look at what is happening with his eyes. If your fault still exists, ask what you can do to remedy the situation.
When each of you will voice your feelings, the conflict may be exhausted itself.
Do not ask a person to immediately forgive you
Even if you apologized, and did her best to rectify the situation, do not expect people just forget about everything and begin to behave as before. It is possible that he was still in the power of negative emotions and has every right to do. He should not ignore their feelings, just to save you from the guilt.